The Sevvy-Lily Picture Show

To the tune of Science Fiction/Double Feature.

The scene is black. Slowly, a spotlight comes up as DUMBLEDORE appears and crosses to center stage.

DUMBLEDORE
Severus Snape was here
In 1952
And his hair still had the grease.
And Malfoy and his pair
Of thugs and long, blonde hair
Were there to make his morals decrease.
He joined Voldemort
An act of great import.
But he suddenly wanted some peace.
Playing a light spy's part,
He'd had a change of heart.
But wanted James Potter deceased…
(spoken) 'Cause of…

Student Friction (Sevvy…oooh) Evil Teacher
Lil scorned James, though he beseeched her.
Snape looked down on them (Oooh ooh ooh)
Mostly Lily
Because of her blood
Though some say really…
He had a cru-u-u-ush.
On the late Miss Lily Potter
Did old Snape.

I know that it was Lupin
Who was off dupin'
His friends into being Animagi
And when Severus Snape
Learned of his proper shape
And owed James something, he wished he had died.
But he owed stuff to those
Marauders, his arch-foes
Though he was a greasy small fry,
But though he loved dark arts,
He developed a heart
Though, I must admit, nobody knows why.
But not-

Student Friction (Sevvy…oooh) Evil teacher.
Umbridge, he…wished to impeach her.
Sevvy is fighting
For the order
Spying and causing
Voldie disorder…
But as to why-y-y-y
He switched sides, well
We'll soon find out
About Snape.
Who used to rape
But now does good.
Why he switched sides,
We'll soon find out
About Snape.
It makes ya gape
That he does good.
Why he switched sides,
We'll soon find out
About Snape.
With his sharp japes.
Why he switched sides,
We'll soon find out
About Snape.